Straight & Narrow Amazing Tales of Reality

OVERVIEW

"Do you have a best friend?" she said.

"I haven't for a while", I said.

"I've been stalking you. I've been listening to every word you've said. I've been watching you when you did not know it, and I've waited for you several times just to catch a glimpse of you", she said.

"Really? I should be flattered."

"Yes. Many have said that you are a person of simple, direct honesty. They call it integrity."

"I've never considered it that way. I just try to keep each day to where I can live with myself", I said.

"I respect that. I'm curious what it is, and how you do it." she said.

"I'm cool with it. Let's be friends."

RE: PERSONAL INTEGRITY

"I think living a lie is the worst kind of existence", she said.

"What do you mean?", I said.

"I can't stand when I am saying one thing, and living another. I don't like myself when I have to put on a front."

"It's not that hard to tell the truth, especially when you've had a really deep experience of what it means to lie", I said.

"I like it because it's freeing. I feel more like myself. I don't feel encumbered, or like I'm helpless. I make honest and direct communication a priority with my kids."

"It shows. They tend to look me in the eye, they seem to be able to communicate what they're feeling."

RE: INTIMACY

"If anything should ever happen to you, I will be deeply affected for the rest of my life", she said.

"I feel the same way about you. I know this has developed a bit rapidly. I suppose the important question is whether it's right for you. But I do feel deeply about you and your kids. I feel like you are a person who I have missed having in my life for many years", I said.

"Yes, I feel the same way. I have always had a tendency to control, to seek a desired outcome in the future. I've always sought a guaranteed result in my relationships, and been let down when the other person didn't live up to my expectation. It has always sabotaged my efforts. I feel free of that with you", she said.

"Yes, it's good to let that go. It's good to enjoy each moment as it comes. It's like letting life unfold on it's own terms, like living according to God's Plan. I'm glad we can share that."

"Yes, the simple things. Sitting by the water, reading quietly, just sitting next to each other. It's deeply intimate. If anything should ever happen to you I will be deeply affected for the rest of my life."

RE: PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

"I've always wanted a relationship that I felt could grow together. I feel like we're walking side by side on the same path, not walking each other's path", she said.

"It does seem to lack certain emotional dependence. Have you always been an introspective type?", I said.

"It comes naturally, I suppose. I always wondered as a kid what it would be like to be part of instead of apart from. I've always felt like I was on the outside, looking in. At what, I don't know. But I have always sensed that working on myself was where the answer would be."

"That's been my experience as well. I suppose that I could have been dealt a worse family to grow up in, but it could have sustained some improvement as well. I've always wanted to leave something a little better for the next generation."

RE: FAMILY

"You are such a good example for my kids. I'm flattered that you're spending time with us. I've always dreamed of having a whole family with good communication. I wish there was a way that you could be here more permanently, but I'm not comfortable to do that without some form of commitment," she said.

There was a long, profound silence.

"I have no problem with marriage. I would marry you in a 'New York Minute", I said.

"Then so it shall be. Until death do we part."

RE: COMMUNITY INVOLVEMENT

"I like being involved in community interaction. I like the church I go to because they've been available for me during the hard times. The kids love their school, they've gone to the same school all their lives. I'm glad you can become a part of it with us", she said.

"I've never really had a chance to spend time with a family. This reminds me of the small town I grew up in. There's a certain familiarity to it", I said.

"Yes, it's true. But I don't let them get too close. I don't always agree with the ideology, and I don't always feel comfortable with some of the ways people can impose. I guess I'm a little aloof, but I do try to be available when folks need a helping hand."

"This is really good. I've often felt the same way. I'm really glad to be part of it with you."

RE: BEAUTY

"I want to go to the jewelry store. I want to pick out a ring set for our wedding", she said.

"Do you know what you want? Do you have something in mind?", I asked.

"Yes. I know a jeweler who has been in business for a long time. All his pieces are given individual attention. He is a local jeweler. I've been there before", she said.

When we arrived at the store, I opened the solid wooden door. The floor of the store was older hardwood, and was well worn. The glass cases seemed to be a bit sparse, and each contained well crafted items that were obviously very valuable. The value seemed to be not so much in terms of dollars or a monetary sense, but a value that can only be given by a high quality of attention. We looked at every ringset in the store, perused every glass case. It didn't take very long, maybe 20 minutes, at most.

"I want that one", she said.

"It's the simplest in the store. Are you sure?", I said.

"Yes. I'm sure. I think it's the most beautiful one here", she said.

"It's fine by me. I like it."

"Are you sure? I don't get the feeling you agree 100%."

"It's more important to me that we have a set of rings, and agree to be married together. I don't think the important part is whether they're gold or silver or whatever."

"They are beautiful, and they look wonderful on our hands. I would be with you anywhere, anytime, for the rest of my life", she said.

CONCLUSION

"My old boyfriend called last night" she said.

"Were you honest with him?" I said.

"Yes. I told him we were seeing each other. That's when he really got weird."

"Did he sound desperate?"

"Yes. That's exactly how he sounded. What do you think of that?" she asked.

"I'm sure you once cared for him, probably still do to a certain degree. But, in my experience, when relationships break up it's for a reason. When they get back together, the reason rarely has changed."

There was a moment of silence.

"You're right about the breaking up and getting back together. It rarely works for the better. You don't know it at this moment, but I do intend to see him. I will choose Fear as my Master. I plan to abort our relationship, and I plan to sever you as a human being. I know you have trusted me implicitly, and have loved me without reservation. Nonetheless, I intend to fuck your best effort into the sewer. I intend to betray you and all that you consider sacred - all that we have created together. I do not care how you, my children, or the community are affected. I will insist that you never again attempt to contact me or the kids, and there will be nothing that you can do about it. You will be powerless, and I will be in control. Before the sun shall rise even once more, I will fade into the wallpaper to live a lie in order to control and hide from the fear that I refuse to feel and accept as my own."

"Then so it shall be - until death do we part."